your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
I almost got runover on the sidewalk by a car but wen it got closer it was a crackhead walking with the whole front of a car... bumper, lights and all... I love New York.
Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
He got a new tattoo in prison. It's actually a good tattoo, making it that much harder for me to hold out until he's off house arrest.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
He sent me a dick pic from his living room and it has pictures of his three kids in the background
I think I won an award for shitting and vomiting at the same time.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
