We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
Some clips from last night: grinded like I haven't since college. Took shots with a bartender with a bad ass mustache. Made up a string of lies with fake names and occupations. Slept behind the couch with pizza in my hand
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
The kid with the ed hardy shirt put a bunch of random shit in the washer and turned it on. example: a hanger, the movie Chocolate with Johnny Depp, and your mom's cat
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
