normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I just want you to know that if I ever had to fight man eating flowers or flying turtles to save my friends they'd be fucked. No one's worth all that bullshit. PS I really need to stop playing Wii while drunk.
My 10 year old brother handed me a pack of condoms and said "here, i don't wanna be an uncle yet."
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
