Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
So after your 27th or so beer, you gave me songs you want to have used if you're ever on intervention.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
We really need to check into harvesting part of our liver now
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I just masterbated to the Lets Get Ready To Rumble theme
You have cats and a ten year IUD. Embrace it.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Randomize