I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Just had ice cream and a blow job come together in one glorious, defining moment.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
