There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
The guy that just projectile vomited over the balcony is now going down to find the pill he just puked up. He said he wasn't about to waste $15.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
