Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
We were still up at 6am, taking shots, because thats apparently how he liked to "get the day started".
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
8 stitches. Next time I decide to twerk while doing a keg stand, stop me.
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
So what if you don't want to be with your family. Go drink alone and watch Netflix like a normal person, don't be productive!
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
Randomize
