Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
how opposed are you to picking me up at the bar at 11:00am?
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Idk... he wears anklets.. i dont think i can get past that.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Randomize
