I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
Hungover Fun Fact #4: Eating a grilled stuffed burrito WILL make you blow chunks in the ice maker at work.
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
The sex was so good I went temporarily numb. Slightly embarrassing when she pointed out I was kissing my own arm.
My dick looks like crazy bread
pics are now mandatory
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Looks like a sea otter shaved my vagina. Keep an eye out for me this weekend, no one can see this.
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
You don't know happiness until you've got to smoke weed inside taco bell and then eat all you want for free
Randomize
