is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
You threw my heel at her from across the street... And hit her in the back of the head so hard she face planted into the street. I need more friends like you.
This is the first time I'm hearing this information.
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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