I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I just figured out that you can toast a marshmallow with a butter knife and a cigarette lighter. I'm like a retarded Mister Wizard
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
So ive come to the realization that my affinity for tattooed guys makes me the literal definition of tit for tat
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
Randomize