Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
I'm too hungover to be in a fucking cow suit right now
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
Don't call police on the strange man passed out in his car in the driveway. I'll be home around noon to collect him.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
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