so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Is it bad that I was more upset about not getting the perfume he told me he had bought for me then the actual breakup?
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
You cant carve pumpkins without vodka. It's a Halloween tradition.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize
