Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
We ended up getting arrested after we flagged down the cops for a ride home with open beers in our hands... turns out the "nobody told me" excuse doesn't cut it anymore
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
this dude, we had a connection. he kept smiling at me. it's like he knew i was gonna facebook stalk the fuck out of him
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
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