just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Ahh you know it's going to be a long day when you mistake a beer for a sprite at 10:30 in the morning while babysitting
I really hope your new roommate never finds out we had a threesome with a bisexual British guy in his room the night before he moved in.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
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