Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Hope your thanksgiving is a complete blowjob festival.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
We held a candle light vigil outside the jail hoping for her release, until we realized we were drunk in the jail parking lot.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
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