are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
my shit smells like andre
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
It really ruins the moment when you have to ask to resend the nude pics.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Bailey. He has a soul patch. Idgaf if he was an NFL player. Nobody with a soul patch is attractive.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Randomize
