I had a dream last night that we were eating cake at Mercy...hahaha. I'm furious I didn't see you.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
he opened up his "box of magic": a crusty tube of KY jelly, three expired condoms, a fingertip vibrater, and a jar of marshmallow fluff.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Is she still in your room?
Not for long. My plan is to smoke her out like a small woodland creature.
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
Randomize
