i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Seriously? He's going to use MY birthday sex as the opportunity to ask if he can pee on me?!? I let him, but wow talk about selfish.
There is a 1000000% chance you'll be turned down if you try coming on to me while I watch Star Wars.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
Randomize
