I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
I'll be gone when you wake up but you hit a girl so I knocked you out. Never hit a girl. Unless it's with your penis.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Ok well my life just seems more exciting by default because I'm dating my married boss and sexting with my ex
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
