no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
The manager of the bar we were at the night before came to my house today giving me coupons. Apperently you and i won karaoke night which is a prize of 300 beer dollars. No idea what beer dollars means nor do i have any memory of doing karaoke but lets go back tonight.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Your job is getting in the way of our day drinking. Shots on the hour are not as cool alone.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
Learn from me. Do not smoke cigs and fold laundry in your room. The cigarette will fall into the dresser without you noticing and your shirts will be on fire. Wanna go shopping tomorrow? I need some new shirts.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
Answered a bio test question bc of watching phineas and ferb. Remind me to always drink when studying.
Randomize
