There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
Drunk in a bar in Texas. The 24 y/o hottie I am chatting up just called me a male cougar. I am dealing with this whole turning 40 thing juuuust fine.
Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
Do you think it would be a good idea to mention in my admissions essay that I was the guy that streaked across the soccer field last year?
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I got to see some gay bartender let a girl with daddy issues whip Travis in the balls with his own belt. Totally worth it.
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
alcohol and riverdancing are a dangerous mix. have a spraind ankle. i die now
It's five in the morning. wtf?
If there was a gecko involved in your BDSM I'm gonna have to request that not happen when we live together ;)
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
Randomize
