i always forget guys have bellybuttons
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
In lieu of flowers, please donate to The Hungover Children's Fund in my name.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
This night could easily degenerate into a drunken haze of strippers and gambling, but I need a support network.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
Randomize
