And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
Three questions... How drunk were you? How long until we can make fun of you for this? Do you even really need a spleen?
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Would be fun, plus since its in public I'll keep my penis in my pants
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
You ate ashes out of my bong
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Come over here. Bongs and porn. I found the promised land
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
