You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
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