I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
She said you were bangin on the counters of McDonalds singing "These Eyes" at 4am
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I said i love rain, just to change the subject, and he said 'id like to do it in the rain'. Dear lord. He doesnt stop
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Two guys I banged regularly got married this week. I need vodka.
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
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