hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
All I'm asking for is flower occasionally, and in return you get to come home to me naked in heels. Is that to much to ask for?
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
That awkward moment when you realize that last night you walked from in n out to petco, bought a mouse for $3, named it mogar, taught it how to skateboard on a techdeck, made it a home out of a trash can, fed it fruity pebbles and cheese, and then forgot where you left it.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
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