sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
slut bingo starts in ten minutes ...
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
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