i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
