anyone who has a picture of a ferrari with the caption "mAh DreAM caR" is getting denied as my facebook friend.
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
You smell like a steam boat captain.
Whatever your on right now, I want.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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