Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
his dad came out and found me sleeping indian style on the couch with my cup balancing on my boobs. didn't spill a drop.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
captain cockblock got me again last night so i put a squirrel in his room and jamed the door shut
She told me I made the cut, and to write my name and number on the white board by the door. I was the 7th number down.
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
Also, I don't know if it's the drugs I'm on or not, but I truly believe I was hypnotized last night listening to an audio book.
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
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