are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
she might purposely get aids just to give it to you. I think she might hate you that much.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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