This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
I would get the one fuckin stripper that's a lesbian. THE ONLY ONE
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
stop sending me battleship coordinates and get back here so i can suck your dick
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I feel like I should treat myself every time I find out I'm not pregnant. Is there a pie company that delivers??
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
