i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
i totally fed the cab driver fruit salad with my hands while he was driving
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
if happy hour never ends, you’ll never have to eat kale
Dude I used amphetamines responsibly today though. I snorted one in the am for work and then chewed one in the pm for other work. I'm an adult.
Randomize
