So some girl kept staring at me and giving me these weird looks. That's when I realized she could probably hear the Mulan soundtrack playing on my iPod...
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
Yea my vagina was pretty pissed at me for not taking advantage of the situation...
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
You may now shotgun with the bride
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I slept like a rock because of your dick. I'll thank him personally later.
we are the best best friends ever. You had sex in an ice cream truck I had sex in a fire truck
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