Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
Should I be worried if two ants just crawled out of my purse?
Yes!
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
She made kool-aid with tequila instead of water and rolled a blunt about the size of an Oscar Mayer hot dog. Best blind date I've ever had. I think I will love her tell my dieing day!
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