it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Either I put my underwear on inside out and wore it like that all day, or I had sex with him. Its sad I have to guess.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
Went to waffle house after dropping my sister off at school and got into a heated argument with a drunk/hungover philosophy professor I will not name. I won the argument.
Randomize
