wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I just found pie in my hoodie pocket... This break needs to end.
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize
