Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Jim came in did 3 body shots of her she said "I like your tongue" and they left. I swear to god its deja vu he's done it before
I feel like this is the moment of high where you have to write these texts down to remember to text them and feel that somehow this is important to the continuity of the world.
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
You see it tends to piss fathers off when they find their daughter in the arms of a shirtless guy that neither he nor his daughter knows.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
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