How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
I cant remeber how long i've been laying here...it could be 10 minutes to a fucking day
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
