Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I smell stomach acid.
Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
I miss you too. And it was nice meeting your brother while I was mounting you
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
It is not a successful senior year unless you show up to campus without pants at least once, right?
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
They were out of watermelon smirnoff, so we got you a fifth of 5 o'clock and an actual watermelon.
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
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