So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
Quote from doctor, "that is a VERY angry vagina".
I'm fucked.
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
