Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
I don't remember anything past "we have 15 minutes to drink this keg."
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
As a matter of fact, I am on the treadmill with the Bottle of UV Blue as we speak.....
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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