so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
I just ate a fried snickers. I now officially accept all fat jokes
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Is it bad if one of my goals right now is to snort blow through a licorice?
Don't answer that. It is bad.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I heard you were drinking whiskey straight from the bottle last night.
Actually I was drinking whiskey straight from 3 bottles, but that is neither here nor there.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
No he's great. He's trying to do "sexy stuff" for me now, which is pretty hilarious. He stirred my daiquiri with his penis last night. He also tied a bouquet of flowers around it.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
We are the rockettes of vaginal bleeding
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
I’m getting reeeeaaalll tired of telling cute boys I gave them chlamydia.
That’s two in three months. You really know how to live.
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