what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
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