I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
In order of importance: Where am I? Where's my car? Where are my clothes? Who is this chick in the room?
Anne's couch, the bar, your car, Anne.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
I'm on A4A looking at dick pics while the CEO is on the phone trying to convince me not to leave the company
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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