Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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