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• (518): View more from New York

  how the fuck did you end up in georgia? you were here at my party dry humping some chick 2 hours ago

  (404): View more from Georgia

  so you mean to tell me that there is no way you can get me?

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• (231): View more from Michigan

  I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.

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• (781): View more from Massachusetts

  my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about

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• (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.

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• (309): View more from Illinois

  It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.

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• (518): View more from New York

  i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??

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• (239): View more from Florida

  His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us

  (1-630): View more from Illinois

  fair point

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• (734): View more from Michigan

  Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  Apparently I'm not allowed to call at 3am anymore and ask to speak to all his siblings. I was just trying to get to know the family

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..

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• (706): View more from Georgia

  If a girl called me a promiscuous philandering Casanova, should I say thank you?

  (901): View more from Tennessee

  Most definitely.

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• (715): View more from Wisconsin

  I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL

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• (804): View more from Virginia

  woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  i feel like i got punched in the face....

  (732): View more from New Jersey

  you did....

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