In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Randomize
