i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I just chugged a whole pitcher of beer in 1 min. 9 sec. A whole goddamn pitcher.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
I told him I was studying his body for art, so now I have to actually do a drawing of him to not look like a creep and so we can hook up again.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
